Mmmm... oh hey you.
Thank goodness you're here, I was about to get desperate!
You know, I am acquainted with some people who have not discovered the joys of your touch.... poor things. What gets me is your versatility, if I want to be warmed up, you get to rubbin'--- I'm feeling frisky and you tickle me juuuuust right.
I see you're trying a new look, and what's that I smell? cha-cha-cherry?? Yum, get over here you stimulating strumpet.
I want you to rub me down and get me off. Don't you go slipping out the door now, just once is never enough... Like the Eurythmics sing it, I want to use you baby.
Whatever your name is--and you have many--I want to say now on behalf of women everywhere, and okay, the men too... You make life better. You spend your days, and allll of your nights making people happy.
Hell, I bet that Mister Jiffy went into car repair just so he could appreciate you properly, get your name on a biiiiiig sign and smile one of those special secret smiles that you seem to elicit every time he looked up.
Babe, I don't say it enough but, I Love You.
(even if you don't always hang out with the best crowd, they're better for having you)
Kisses (to start with...) from
[Testament to the greatness of Lubricant]