I thought you were nice
Imagine my chagrin (yes, I am smart enough to use the word "chagrin" without sounding pretentious, so deal.) when I was informed that you were A CONFEDERATE. A lab volunteer who spends his days playing OUR games with other girls, and guys too!
How could you do this to me Jacob? My sweet, sweet Jacob
Anyway, I basically wrote to say
Ps. you can totally still call me though...